I left my pad at home with my list of 10 gifts, so I’m having to jump ahead to one that I was saving. =)
Gift 5: A love for the Lord
I was having a rough day today. I have those sometimes. Sometimes I have them often. I came here to the library and immediately turned on the Mormon Message, "The Hope of God’s Light". I don’t understand it fully, but that message sings to me, and brings peace to my soul. I feel it empower me and lift me, every time, no matter what. I listened to it four or five times, and then I listened to a talk by Elder Bruce R. McConkie. By the end, I didn’t hurt anymore. I wasn’t sad. I wasn’t irritated. I feel happy, and good, and I feel the Spirit of the Lord, and it feels like love. I lived my life for a long time without the companionship of the Lord’s comforter. It’s dark there. It’s cold. I spent so much effort wanting to feel differently. I could write a book trying to explain that life and why we do what we do there. But I shared that to contrast to what I feel right now, in this moment. I feel light, and life, and goodness, and love. I feel it so powerfully. It fills me up. I know the difference as clearly as I can tell the dark from the light. But the beautiful part about my life now, is that I know how to find it, and that I choose to go there. I knew where I needed to go today. I knew what would bring be back into tune with the Lord and His Spirit. Now, I’m here, and it’s beautiful, and I’m happy. It’s that easy. It really, truly is. The Lord doesn’t want us to sit in darkness, and if we choose to turn to Him, He’ll lift us out as quickly as we’re ready for. I love Him for that.
There is an interesting verse in the new testament. 1 John 4:19 says, "We love him, because he first loved us". I’m grateful for that explanation, and for what it teaches me about the love of Christ. He loves us first, and always. This transfer I have made it a goal and a commitment to pray for and work to gain charity. I learned from the Book of Mormon that "charity is the pure love of Christ" (Moroni 7:47). Well, what that says to me, is that for us to have Charity, we need to love others first.
Above is a picture of Elder Dillon Sorenson and myself, not as bright eyed, not as bushy tailed, awake at 3am on transfer day to see him off. The night before, as we drove home in what would be our last time alone together, he shared with me some things I had no idea he had gained during our companionship. He wept. I had no idea how much I had affected him. I grew in love for him that night, as I saw how he loved me. I am grateful for my mission, and will be forever. I have been changed by it. I have learned who my Savior is, and truly knowing Him, I love Him so much more.
This Gospel is true. I know it. I share it in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
All my love,